Some words about my wedding:
I thought I would be more nervous. In fact, all week previous to the wedding, I felt like I was getting nervous about being nervous. The thing is, I knew I had nothing to be nervous about – Stephanie and I have lived together for two-plus years, been together for over four years and also have already bought a house together. Nothing about getting married to Stephanie made me nervous. But you always hear stories about how nervous the groom is and you see countless videos of dudes passing out at the ceremony. Maybe there was a self-fulfilling prophecy here – was I was psyching myself out? Probably. Then I had a phone call with a co-worker of mine, someone whom I deeply respect, and he encouraged me to go to the site of the wedding and simply walk down the aisle with no one there and envision the day – that would help. So I did, and he was right.
The wedding day itself had to be one of the most special days I’ve ever had in my life. There are times in life when specific emotions pop up with intensity – anxiety when you have to present to a group of people, a rush of excitement when you make a nice play or get a big goal in a hockey game, or the great feeling of satisfaction you get when you see a truly funny or well-made film. Things like that. My wedding day was the most wonderfully intense combination of emotions I have ever experienced. Instead of just one prevailing feeling, there were many pistons pumping and the pedal was to the medal – excitement, happiness, love, and anxiety were all swirling around me like a furious swarm of bees and I had never experienced anything like it. Not to mention the 30 some odd people who were there with us – people whom we consider incredibly special to us, from the very young to the old. I wish I could have bottled the whole thing up.
The actual ceremony seemed like a ten minute dream. It was held in the backyard of a 200 or so year-old Colonial New England home – the house where my wife grew up. The gardens were, in a word, unbelieveable. A white dove had arrived a few days before and was present on the roof. The weather was humid, but not unacceptable and more importantly, dry. We had an acoustic guitar player. Suddenly, it was happening. My future wife was walking down the aisle and I could do nothing else but look her right in the eyes and clearly state our promises, our vows. I couldn’t hear the guitar player, couldn’t hear traffic, couldn’t hear birds, couldn’t hear anyone. The only thing I saw was the person who I would be married to within minutes and the look on her face – of love, of passion, of wide-eyed excitement and of admiration. It was a look I have never seen on her and certainly one I will never, ever forget. Ever. I was in the zone. The moments when I was up there are ones I will cherish forever. The moment we were pronounced husband and wife was simply magical. We walked down the aisle afterwards, at which point we embraced and completely broke down.
Without getting overly verbose, the rest of the night was incredible. The entire party (roughly 32 of us) all had dinner together at a restaurant which we rented out for the night. The food was superb, the company was superb and night itself was unforgettable. After everyone had left, Stephanie and I stood outside in a very light rain, just hugging. We couldn’t bring ourselves to leave yet. We needed another hour or two with the people we loved and had just gone through this experience with. We knew we had the next day, a day which would bring another party, this time with 130-plus people, but for that moment, I had never wished so hard for time to stop in its tracks so I could continue wallowing in what had been the best couple hours of my life.
Song now playing: The Beach Boys – “God Only Knows”