Yes, I know this is the second week without an Item Five interview, but it’s certainly not due to lack of effort on my part. I have several committments from a few people, the only problem is that they haven’t gotten their answers back to me. So I wait. Absence makes the blog-heart grow fonder, doesn’t it?

So this morning I had to bring my car in for its annual check-up and three month oil change. Additionally, the interior door handle on the passenger side has broken, which means if you’re sitting in passenger seat, you either have to open the window to reach out and open the door from the outside or wait for me to walk around and open the door for you. They will be looking at that. So why the hell am I writing about this? Well, my warranty expires at 36,000 miles. When I pulled into the service bay this morning, my odometer read 35,999. I kid you not. I told them to scour the car for anything that might be able to be fixed under warranty. How many think they will? (crickets…….tumbleweeds……..crickets….)

One of the finest inventions the internet has ever seen is You ever get a small rush of excitement when you click on an article on the web from in a distant newspaper that you really want to read, but then you have to register for the damn thing? Usually I just don’t bother taking the time because it’s intrusive and annoying and, as Stephanie once said, “I don’t want to get spam emails from the Miami Herald.” Well, those days are over. has passwords and usernames for nearly every registration-based newspaper out there. Bless their little hearts. Go to the site, get your password, read your article, everything is good in the world, brothers and sisters.

A couple of news stories:

So, up there in Canada, they’re looking for roughly $57,000 worth of stolen beer. Hmmm…..if they have any common sense up there, they should be on the lookout for a large, 350-pound bear, maybe?

Finally, and most importantly, is the news that Quentin Tarantino will be making an appearance in the next Muppet movie. I am waiting with baited breath to see the newest Muppet, The Gimp.

Song now playing: The Pernice Brothers – “Number Two”