Every now and then I’ll go over to Au-Bon-Pan and pick up a fruit cup (grapes, watermelon, cantaloupe, honey dew). Sidenote: I am on a pretty insane diet for absolutly no reason. I’m not even close to overweight, I work out 3 times a week and I pretty much eat right. Yet, I’m still on a diet – every morning I mash all kinds of fruit together with some protein powder and orange juice and I make smoothies. I righteously avoid sweets – most of the time. I mean, I’m not insane about it, but I do occassionally stuff pieces of cake or pie into my mouth. I generally eat enough vegetables, although I suppose I could increase that a little.

Oh, anyway, so I go over to Au-Bon-Pan and get a fruit cup, right, and I open it up and start shoving nature’s candy into my mouth. Hello, delicious little red grape. Nice to eat you, succulent, bright orance, juice cantaloupe. And major props to you, Honey Dew, for brightening up the fruit cup with your flourescent green tinge and refreshing, distinctive taste. Hi there, watermelon – but wait – you’re littered with those disgusting black seeds. I can’t eat those, and I refuse to obsessively stick my fingers into my mouth continuously and pull out black watermelon seeds while sitting at my desk. Forget it, dude. And hell no, I certainly won’t be performing any raucous displays of spitooning them into my trash basket from my desk. No way, San Jose. So why can’t Au-Bon-Pan just take the frickin’ seeds out? Why can’t they? Huh? Huh? Why? Oh, how I like the fruit cup, though. And I got a salad. Au-Bon-Pan is pretty good. They used to own Panera Bread, which is MAJOR-LEAGUE bad-ass. My favorite lunch place!