Dealing with two kids with fevers since last Thursday. That part isn’t so bad. The bad part is that you’re pretty much trapped in the house the entire time because of the weather and the responsibility you feel to NOT get other people ill.

There are plenty of rational fears in regards to bringing up children, but if I started talking about them you’d fall asleep. I want to talk about irrational fears. During Steph’s pregnancy, some irrational fears I had included poop. How would I react to changing diapers? I did some reading on the subject and also some searching on YouTube. The latter was a mistake. This is sort of like going on WebMD to look up symptoms – never a good idea. YouTube has a lot of plain vanilla instructional videos on changing diapers (why do they all look like they’re from 1988?) but even MORE videos of fathers freaking out while changing a baby because of a particularly messy payload. Exhibit A:

But really, it’s nothing like that. Those dudes are in the minority. Changing diapers has been no problem at all for me, and I do it A LOT. I think my only other truly irrational fear is being puked on. That’s one that makes me very nervous. My wife, always so calm in these kind of situations, can deal with it. It’s happened to her a couple of times – she sits with the kiddo and strokes his hair and calms him down while it’s all there on her. Ick. I can’t even fathom. I suspect if I get puked on (and I haven’t yet, thankfully), I would immediately rip off my shirt, or whatever article of clothing got the shrapnel, and run upstairs to clean myself off.

Now, when I get puked on, and I know I will eventually, my actions will probably be more tempered than I am describing here. Much like all the other things I was worried about. But if I can avoid it, well, that will be a) a miracle and b) something I will brag about for the rest of my days.

Now I’ve just jinxed myself, haven’t I?